Ever go into a store and try on a dress and fall completely in love with it, but there’s just one small problem? Either it doesn’t fit your body as it’s meant to (design problem, not body problem). It either doesn’t fit right, fall right, or it’s just not cut right. I ran into this issue when I was shopping recently. I tried on this beautiful, red pleated, off-the-shoulder dress, and fell completely in love. It fit great, felt comfortable, and I loved the color on me. But before I could get too excited, I came out to the three-way mirror to take a closer look and saw that the pleated romantic flutter panel on the bodice wasn’t cut straight across the waist. The sales associates pulled another dress for me to try on, but it was cut the same so they said it was supposed to be that way. But, it just didn’t look right to me.
You Can’t Love A Dress Into Fitting You Right.
I loved the dress so much I bought it anyway, despite my better judgement. I came home, hung the new bold red number in my closet and went on with my night. The next morning I woke up, and I just knew I had to return it. I thought it would be a good time to also try on the two comfortable tops I got to help fill in my “at home” wardrobe gap. Both shirts were really cute, but just made me look boxy. So, I returned those, too.
This is a classic example of how you try to fill your wardrobe gaps, or buy things that you love, that just aren’t right for you. It has nothing to do with you or your body. Sometimes the way the shirt was made just doesn’t work.
So what do you do after you do the right thing and return it? Let me repeat myself. Please return the item. You cannot love the dress into becoming a good fit. It either fits you right, or it doesn’t. I think this is where I see a lot of women go into blaming themselves, their bodies, and really it has nothing to do with them, and everything to do with the structure and cut of the item. Read this again and please, please be easy on yourself.
Return What Doesn’t Fit. Find A Similar Style Somewhere Else.
That night I was on the gram, as usual, and saw a friend post a picture of a simple white, GUESS logo tank top. I immediately got taken back to my upbringing. I loved Guess, but I haven’t shopped there since I lived in Los Angeles. What happened next: I went to the GUESS website and looked for a similar red dress and tee shirts that I knew WOULD fit me perfectly. Why? Because one: I love the brand, and I used to shop there all the time, so I know my size and I know what works.
I found this beautiful, Beachfront Babylon two-piece maxi dress that had a similar cut and style. The print is different, but dress shares similar details to the solid red pleated one. I let the red dress at the other store be a guide. I don’t have to get that exact same dress in the same exact color, but it’s a clue to look for a similar silhouette and style. And GUESS what?! This new style was on sale, beauties!!! See what happens when you shop in alignment?! This dress was a better choice for the following reasons:
- The silk fabric is one of my favorite materials to wear.
- I love it just as much, if not more and it’s on sale!
- The ruffled off the shoulder bodice is the same.
- The crop top, and lush skirt with the cascading ruffles down the hem makes it a sexier dress! (And y’all know I’m all about dressing sexy at all times).
While I was on the GUESS website, I also found a substitute for a comfortable top that I could wear when I’m lounging around the house. It’s the same soft tee shirt in the same cinder grey color, but again it’s a cropped tee shirt, which is going to make me feel sexier even when I’m chilling at home.
Sexuality Stylist Tip: Always Keep It Sexy By Dressing Sexy One Way Or Another.
Another #sexualitystylist tip I live by is making sure you dress sexy one way or another. Whether that be a cropped t-shirt and curve flattering leggings at home, or flirty lingerie underneath your business suit during a board meeting. I think this keeps you from falling into a style rut, or dressing the the part of the social role that you play on a regular basis. Insert stay at home mom, CEO, remote employee, etc. Your clothes are here to make you feel the way you want to feel, and although we all need our cozy, comfortable days, we don’t need to walk around 24/7 like we just left the yoga studio. No judgement. I’ve been there myself.
What To Do Next:
I recommend searching the description of the item you fell in love with in the store and either writing it down, or putting it in your notepad on your phone. Next, go to familiar brands you love and Google the same fit details as the item that wasn’t quite right. Get to know the materials you love by trying things on and seeing what makes you happy when you try certain fabrics, colors, silhouettes on. Start there. Let your inspiration guide you to the perfect fit. Putting in the time to find the right fit is so important. Trust me when I say that even though you love that red dress, something will be off every time you wear it and that will come through in how you feel while you’re wearing it whether you know it or not. It’s just like dating a great guy that is a great guy, but not the guy for you. Same kinda feeling. See what I mean? Take the time. Your wardrobe will thank you.